Christmas is coming...

I was just now typing up my Christmas Wish List. Kinda fun dreaming of the stuff I’d like to have, things like power tools and kitchen gadgets. Then I sat down and attacked the much more difficult job of writing up a wish list for my spouse. My husband is somewhat renown for being difficult to shop for. He has tastes vastly different from other people (most notably his family members) and consequently they end up doing a lot of head scratching when shopping for his Christmas Gifts and almost inevitably end up giving him a gift certificate to a book or music store. He likes that, and appreciates that most of them have just finally given up trying to cipher out his unusual tastes and just give him the certificate or gift card so he can just get himself something he’d actually LIKE.

I am his wife however and have not, nor shall I be content to give him an impersonal piece of cardstock or plastic. This is our third Christmas together and I’m finally starting to get the hang of choosing things to his liking. As a special effort I just spent nearly an hour on the net hunting for those things I KNEW he’d really enjoy and cut and pasted not only the names and titles and what not but just where they can be found. I hope this time around he’ll receive gifts from people he loves things he will really love.

Hmm, this started out as a response to my dear friend Startraveler’s blog about the value and importance of not only educating our children, but setting an example of the JOY of learning. But the intro had me thinking about the book I wanted to get my husband for Christmas and before you know it this has turned into an I-want-to-be-a-considerate-gift giver this holidays season kinda entry. Ah well, blog postings happen, as they should. Who am I to argue with the somewhat-socially-challenged-computer-geekish-not-quite-divine-yet-still-quite-lovely-and-inspiring Muse of the Blog?

That being said.

Books are good, I like reading em a lot, I like WRITEING them even more…
SIGH,
Boy, I don’t know if it’s the having braved the greyhound bus for hours in the dark of the night and only getting fours hours of sleep talking or all the triptiphane from the Turkey, but I’m exhausted. I think I shall leave this lame little bit of writing as it is and sign off. I am presently with out ‘net at home and though bereaved (or at the very least quite inconvenienced) will solider on and do more net stuff at the in-laws tomorrow while I still have access.

Do think hard on the ‘things’ you give those you care for this holiday season. To paraphrase a dear friend ‘things are nice, I like things…” but they are just stuff. The best gifts are those that entailed TIME. Whether it was the time it took to bake someone their favorite baked good, or the time spent really pondering what another person would appreciate and then hunting down just the thing. Show someone you love (or like) that you love em (or like em) with more than just stuff. Time is the most precious commodity we have to offer. I encourage you to take those extra minutes to ask what someone would REAlLY like, do a little reasearh, make or improve an item, just spend that time and whatever the result the individual will notice the effort and appreciate it. Seriously, trite as it may sounds, I believe the time put into a gift (or a relationship for that matter) is in the end what is most imporant.

Go make someone a construction paper and crayon card.
Debbie

I Blog therefore I AM...

I just read a friend's blog I hadn't ever visited before (thanks for pointing the way Thatgirl to Phineas G. Mongoose's blog) and was moved by the response by this guys friends to his recent posting. I was touched by thier genuine concern for his welfare and I have to say I too posted a comment. It got me thinking. This next bit is what I ruminated on and I hope you'll enjoy it.

I AM...

<> Last year I had a bit of a tough patch in my life, and when I say 'bit' I mean one of the hardest periods of my existence thus far. I had a lot of things going on, many, many hard things. Someone I loved dearly had made a serious attempt to end her life. I was working with and for a woman in a wheel chair who's mother was verbally and at times emotionally abusive (which I got to hear all about and witness first hand) my ex and his new partner decided I was no longer able to even cross the threshold of their home to see my child, I got laid off from a job I REALLY liked after only six weeks of working there, I was dead broke and behind on my bills and to make it all easier to cope with hadn't slept well for over two months (like lets say averaging three hours of sleep a night for weeks on end).

I pretty much lost it.

In fact come to think of it, that was right about the time I started blogging.

Coincidence?

I doubt it.

I work really hard at being self aware, REALLY hard. I figure if I the sole resident of my skin doesn't know whats going on in my little head, then who the hell would? I do whatever I can to understand myself and my motives. I write in a journal, I write fiction, I write in my blog, I see councilors, talk to church leaders, talk to my spouse, talk to my mother (a LOT so thanks Ma, by the way) search, ponder and pray. I do all that and more just so I can get to the bottom of whatever it is that is troubling me (and heaven knows I'm troubled).

Because if I understand what I really think and feel, if I know why it is I react the way I do to any given stimuli I can DO something about it. If my own motives are a mystery to me how could I ever possibly hope to change them? If I don't know what it is that drives me, how the hell can I do anything about it?

I have been diagnosed with all SORTS of 'conditions' and 'issues' and 'illnesses', among others, there are: Diabetic, Dyslexic, Depressive, Atraxic, Anemic and Amnesic oh my!

In one way I genuinely like having words to explain what the hell my problems are, (but hey I just like WORDS in general, I am a writer after all). It feels kind of good to have labels for these things that have been a part of my life for all or most of my life thus far.

The problem with that is that they are well--labels.

I am not a label.

I am a girl, a woman in point of fact. I am a mother, a wife, a child, a singer, songwriter, novelist and poet, I am a sculptor, stain glass artist and jeweler, I am a student, nurses aide and scientist, I am a blogger, geek and trekkie.

I am all of those things and more, and yet that isn't quite right ethier, they're just what I DO, not what I AM.

I am a literal descendant of a divine being, in short a true 'Daughter of God'.

That's closer, but still defines me in relationship to something else. It's a GOOD relationship mind you, a vital, life giving and life altering one, but still doesn't explain WHO I am.

I am Debbie.

There, for all those to whom Corijezmi was a super-human-wordsmith-of-wonder I am now - for all those in the great black void of cyberspace- revealing my secret identity.

I am Debbie and it's very nice to be me.

There ya go, I hope someone out there reads this and learns something wether about me or themselves it's all good.

Go write something NICE about yourself

Debbie
(otherwise known as Corijezmi the Great)

married myth

this is a quote my sister in law recently forwarded me, normally I'm not a huge fan of all things forwarded, but this one was so apt and well spoken I thought I'd share it here.
I do hope this finds all who read this well.

Most people get married believing a myth—That marriage is a beautiful box
full of all the things they have longed for: companionship, sexual
fulfillment, intimacy, and friendship. The truth is that marriage, at the
start, is an empty box. You must put something in before you can take
something out. There is no love in marriage; love is in people, and the
people put love into marriage. There is no romance in marriage; people
have to infuse it into their marriages. A couple must learn the art and
form the habit of giving, loving, serving, praising—keeping the box full.
If you take out more than you put in, the box will be empty.
--J. Allen Peterson


I for one couldn't agree more.

go kiss your spouse

Cori